Pre-Mom life vs Mom life

Here is the last column I wrote about my pre-Mom life. I know it's the length of a novel compaired to blog-length - sorry I have to write that much.

In my pre-mom life I was a different person. I was organized, a list maker and dabbled in a little bit of everything – a renaissance woman of sorts. My Mom life consists of moments of organization, until my boys enter the room. I rarely make lists since they make me feel like I accomplish nothing and I try to do a multitude of things but really only do one or two well.

I once was organized, before I became a mom. Everything had a place and a place for everything. All of the dishes had neat little piles and were sorted according to color and design. My bedroom closet was the same way. In the bathroom everything was orderly and sorted on shelves. My dishes are now in the dishwasher when clean. I know it’s time to do another load of dishes when the dishwasher is empty. There is no color coordination – especially in the cabinets or closets. Clothes are lucky to be put away. Often they are put away from the week before so I can do the current week’s laundry. Does laundry ever end? The bathroom now has a basket that everything just gets thrown into – no more neat little shelves and organization.

I used to make lists, lots of them. I had lists for shopping, to do, people to call, things to think about when I had the time, new things to try and all sorts of things. I even had a master list of all my lists in my head. I would refer to these lists all the time and constantly revise, update, and cross things off my lists. I would even stay up at night to finish my to do list – not able to sleep until my list was all completed, crossed off, accomplished. I would even write something down that I had already done just so I could cross it off – that gratifying feeling of putting a line through something achieved.

I rarely make lists now. The list just grows and grows; rarely does anything have a line through it. It is easier to not make the list and just occasionally get something done instead of being on the list for over a month then having to make a new list so I do not have to be reminded that I did not accomplish anything yet.

In my pre-mom life, I would read all the time. I could read volumes of books, anything under 300 or 400 pages was considered small. I would read at home, on the bus, while commuting with books on tape, just about everywhere. I always had a back up book on hand just in case I had to wait somewhere. Now, I have a hard time reading a chapter of anything. I do occasionally start a short book (100 pages or less) but read the first 20 pages, fall asleep, and never make it back to the book and give up a month later. I still have not read book seven of Harry Potter – what a travesty.

I was an explorer, always trying new things and traveling to new places – a gypsy of sorts. Now I may try a new dish at a restaurant, a new route to work, other non-thrilling things. My adventures include watching Dora the Explorer, Globe Trekker - a travel show on PBS, or visiting my parents twice a year in Utah. But these are adventures that fit my life now. I still dream of future travel when we are empty nesters.

I have resigned myself to scrapbooking and occasional quilting as my “new things.” I did go sledding with my boys the last few snowstorms – that was big for me. New adventures of a different sort – teaching my boys things I have already done, explored, tried – both loved and unloved since they may love them. I want them to be free-spirits, the kind I was before I had them.

My life is different now and I am a different person, a new person, a mom.